I hate being a father reddit

Last UpdatedMarch 5, 2024

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This won’t really change until they’re out on their own. Im just done with how i am, I hate myself and Im scared that I will turn into my own father. 2M subscribers in the TrueOffMyChest community. You don't need to be perfect or love every minute but you do have to be a fucking father. And I hope the other Hapas here wake up and see who your parents are and the crimes they have committed against you. There's the false idea that males are always the perpetrators of violent, and sexual assault crimes. Smokiiz • 1 mo. Drinks alcohol every fucking day, and thinks that my mom is his slave. The issue is I hate being married. You’re feelings on this are valid. Thank you for helping me put words into my dislike for being a stepparent. You are exhausted mentally and physically, you are not getting the breaks that you need and you aren’t in a good place in your relationship with your wife. But ever since he lost his job, and then stayed home full time to take care of our kids. He may have not physically abuse us, but he is still a f*cking piece of shit. I have to give my husband an “allowance”every month on top of other things. You say there’s no specific reasons for feeling hatred for him, but there are obviously some issues here buried beneath the surface. When you’re grown and independent you’ll have control over your own life. I would 100% get married to my husband again. Its painful being a father in this day and age : r/TwoHotTakes. You'll eventually get to sleep, I promise. Then the overprotective dad is actually 100% what this sub is asking for. MallardDuckBoy. Venting - Advice Welcome. Official subreddit of Asmongold aka ZackRawrr, an Austin, Texas based Twitch streamer, YouTube… That being said there’s a lot of people on this show that frustrate me and none more than her dad. I don't know if it's a boomer thing, a retired white guy who only hangs out with retired white guys thing, him being a dick or some combination thereof, but it's Apr 28, 2019 · I can’t tell you how many new moms and new dads feel exactly like this and are living in silence because they feel ashamed. I am in my early 30s with a six year old. There is a pressure to be stoic, emotionless, and almost robotic. Life is a risky option, and assuming the father might be a bad person is no more fair than assuming the OP is a good mother after telling the anonymous internet masses that she hates being a mother. You're going to get much of your life back. What you said about it not bringing anything enjoyable into your life, resonates with me. Feelings are just feelings – they are not actions, they don’t define you, they r/Invincible. It's a crap-shoot. My husband has admitted that while he loves our 3 year old, he really hates being a father and that he is basically going through the motions taking care of her, and if he really understood what he was getting into with parenthood, he would have never had a child. Single mom (who is a doctor so she's barely around) and didn't meet my dad. Posted by u/derdiddl3s - 54 votes and 78 comments In retrospect, I acknowledge being quite the handful as a toddler and don't blame my father for many of the things he did (I used to get beatings almost daily for meltdowns). I'm 27 and in Fuck that. OP is not even financially independent, craving for parental approval and looks like household doesn’t even offer emotional support and resilience. If anything, even though I’m straight, having gay parents made me more I hate being a single mom. I'm no longer the happy individual I was, I'm miserable inside. Sometimes, I even really like them. And I hate that. Fast forward many years, I’m successful and married 10 years with two children. Cause without it, I see someone who has been raised from infancy to self-sufficiency by their parents, who have survived what appears to be a litany of horrors and challenges to do so. Things will be okay, you feel like you're drowning right now but things will turn out to be worth it. From the outside looking in, we currently have the perfect little family. I dunno This is a long rant because I have nobody to talk to IRL. I share my emotion, I've broken down infront of my parent and parents separately, I don't keep it in. I feel like I could have a much better relationship with them if I were the cool aunt or something. It does fit the trend of short and soft old Nordic boy names which has been building for a while though. Invincible is an Image Comics and Amazon TV series named for its superhero, "Invincible" ("Mark Grayson"). I hate him since I was four. My experience with being a step-father and why I won't have children in the future. My husband regrets becoming a father. It’s your child and your partner. I met him about 10 times after I turned 18, still not real interested in getting to know me. Building in structures that help you both know what to expect should help him feel safer and give you both more of a chance to enjoy each other. Your actions are telling her that she isn't good enough and you're just as much to blame as her deadbeat sperm donor. Happiness, and anger seem to be the only exceptions to this rule. I have three kids, two girls - ages 4 and 1. I’ve always said, even before being a dad, I’ll always be there for my children. As a new, first-time dad, I hate my baby intensely – what do I do? My son is 25 days old today, and I hate him. It’s not “the child” or “the mom”. Good luck with raising her, and I'm sure you'll make a wonderful father :) Reply reply. We all love each other, my husband and I both have stable jobs that we like and we share housekeeping/childcare tasks fairly equally (if First of all, people who hate kids or hate their partners kids need to break up and find childless people to date. As smart as the kid is, every part of raising her is a chore. He is coming to the end of year 7 in high school. PERSONAL. What you hear a lot from these types of people, especially if they are older than their 20s, is that it is difficult to find potential mates that don't have kids. The situation is what it is, I can't change it. All my dad friends who said they cried and love being a dad, I find zero joy in my son. I do want to change who I am,hell I dont even know who I am. I hate it so much and I hate myself for being so weak, but I still want my dad. I hate being a mother. I don’t even want to call him dad. Plus lots of them are so cool. I have a 1 year old child and I love being a dad. But I hate it, I cannot stand it. "There's so much screaming, whining, and I do feel like a horrible father,and i know I am. Not for opinions, not for relationship advice, and not for preaching. The big thing is that it takes time to do this and time to process years of emotions from years of trauma. Many dads are really evil and they are hiding behind a society that only likes men. r/TwoHotTakes. And society does a pretty bad job at recognizing the struggles of the hardworking dads out there. Some were never meant to be parents. This dream is a nightmare, there are no rainbows and butterflies, just dark clouds and rain. She wouldn’t of even had to make the deal if her inpatient asshole father Parenting represents inescapable obligation. I feel almost nothing towards him. Now that I’m the sole breadwinner things are just weird. In a post on Reddit , the anonymous man, 31, explained that he has a daughter who is Just know that your child may grow up to resent you for being absent. Here is the clinical criteria for Gender Dysphoria for your review. This pushes aside the male victims, who are often forced to struggle alone. • 8 hr. To put it simply, a good dad is nothing if not a hero. They're my kids. It will pass. We have been married since I was 23 and he was 25. r/Invincible. S1 & S2 are out now and S3 is on the way! Mark Grayson is a normal teenager, except for the fact that his father Nolan is the most Posted by u/dad43987947827348 - 13 votes and 8 comments I will NEVER stop being a hater to my parents. Just like you, they feel like they can’t tell anyone because, like you said, “they’ll be horrified to hear what I’m feeling. It’s not weak to be empathetic or progressive. A place to get personal things off your chest. I have two children, aged six and eight. I have a 12 year old son. A man that is well aware of the struggles and dangers in the world that women have to face. Ogbkpmb. They are the worst child rapists in history. Make your choices, good luck. I changed my mind. If you stood up and acted like a father to her then maybe she would change her ways. You can lead them through life’s tragedy and society’s malevolence in a way that makes all tragedy and malevolence worth the trouble to confront, and worth enduring. ”. Once they get old enough for school things change. You can do whatever you want. Getting her dressed is a wrestling match. I hated growing up with gay parents. SlapHappyDude. I feel like I'm trapped in my own house. Here are some ideas — not all of them will be right for you and they are all easier said than done, but if you want to fight for your marriage and to find some happiness in being a dad again, you have to start somewhere: Get your kids to help with chores. Periods. Please don’t inflate it to justify the correlations you’ve drawn, they’re not accurate. Just because he did something that you resent him for , it does not necessarily make him a My child is 8 weeks old. I feel like I don't have to go too into detail because if you're here, you already know what I'm talking about. I love the realism of him being a bad father and imo I think the show does a wonderful job of showing he could have been a better dad. It’s okay to hate being “dad” all the time because you don’t really get to define this relationship. Not for opinions, not for relationship advice, and…. I find every single day to be a struggle. It is not that you hate being a father or husband it is the situation that has developed around you. Don't get me wrong, I love my children, and I'm certainly not worried that I'm going to harm them or anything, but for most of my life I really, really don't like them. Advice Request. Strict beauty standards. My wife is a stay-at-home Mum. You really have no idea how exhausting parenting actually is until you get thrown into it. I (30s F) am my parents' (70s F/M) only child, and I have been struggling with my relationship with them my whole adult life. Created by writer Robert Kirkman with artists Cory Walker & Ryan Ottley. 99% of the time I keep it positive, you have to. It just sucks that most the time, the kids barely even know their parents 3. And life sucks. Stay strong and good luck. He is being supported for ADHD and ODD. I can relate, I find zero joy in being around SS14. You might find you love being a dad some day. "Unfortunately, this won't be a post with a humorous twist. You hate being a dad, you dreaded your child’s arrival, you slept in the same bed as your “secret friend”, you sneak around behind your wife’s back to hide this relationship, and your secret friend is obviously sexually attracted to you. He wouldn't have been a good dad so in the end I think it was for the best. Wow! What terrible responses on here. I always wanted kids. It all started when I went on a backpacking trip and fell in love with a woman, I loved her character so much, we would roll on the floor laughing, lived simply, enjoyed each others time and I had never smiled and laughed so much before, even with my There is life beyond being your mother’s daughter with all those familial expectations. It's not normal that your child screams all day. Like all i do is sleep eat work repeat. Don’t let anyone minimize your feelings though. I can't imagine how hard it is in you and how you hurt for your child. This can take a lot of forms and you can provide a back stop and emotional support but as their world grows so do their problems. Figure it out, or don’t. I own my own house and I am with their father and we are happy. People get spoilt and lazy very quickly. Hello everyone, I'm writing this to vent my feelings and thoughts of being a father to a 4-year-old autistic child. I wouldn’t mind making a lot more than him. Posted by u/windbagfibber - 36 votes and 60 comments Tell your father the same thing except also tell him you want no contact with him outside of therapy for the time being and that your mom has nothing to do with your feelings about him, that he, and he alone, is responsible for how you feel about him and you need him to accept responsibility for that instead of blaming your mom. Add your thoughts and get the conversation going. I dont know, if you're someone who can barley take care of themselves, do yourself and your future child a favor and just put off having children until you can afford them. I can't believe I am saying this, but I hate being a mom. Every time you say good bye to her tell her that you love her, tell her that when you're gone you'll still be looking down on her. These problems started when he was 2 years old. I honestly do. He has behavioral problems. I'd go from trying to convince myself I love him to, "no. • 2 yr. It gets easier to find time for your relationship a d they get to the age where it isn't streszful to have them in public. I'm tired of being the only reliable person and between him and my wife I have 2 children to take care of except he has simple needs. They don't ever like it. Really honest. Hate. He berates my mother, constantly mocks and belittle his children, and act as if the world revolve around him. The silver lining of single parenting is getting to call all the shots and run your household the way you want to. Fishing, working on the car, baking pies, biking, sledding, fishing, playing Mario Kart - a fun thing that you two do together. I'd spend hours trying to convince myself I love him. I’m so mad about Betty having to lie to Daniel to make the deal so her dad could get back into Mexico. Abortion having a longer sentence than r@pe. It's not doing either of you any good. Money is not the issue. The fact that it brings no value to your life is a real reason not to enjoy being a step-parent. I have a 14 month old daughter and my wife and I have been together for over 10 yrs. Take whatever legal steps you need to, to have a paternity test and establish whether you really are the father. Start with building out Dad/Son traditions. Trust me, what you are doing is 1000x easier than trying to actively parent with someone who complicates decision-making and undermines you as a parent. You say you feel guilty, but you also seem pretty emotionally detached from it all. Every time I'd hate him MORE by the end. He'd cheated on my mum multiple times and he's continuing to do so. I really hate being a mother. They're part of me. Some parents are preferential to certain ages. It just kills me when someone says I am a great dad,it just kinda feels like fraud in a weird way. I've been thinking about it all day. I just wish he would explain to me why he left and be honest about it. If you can answer yes to a few of them, you probably do. 20. My sister is gay, many of my friends are gay. We were friends with benefits for a while, and of course one day the condom broke, she got pregnant, and said she wanted to be a mom. Basically the father I always dreamt of. I hate being the “breadwinner”. Things have changed. We are currently living 800 miles away from friends and family, so we only have ourselves to depend upon. He gives me financial support, pretty sure a lot more than other children could even dream of. I’m trying so hard to just push thru and stay positive. Boomer Story. My wife and I had our son 3 weeks ago, and I don’t think I’m cut out to be a dad like all of you. It does change and does get easier. FunkNugget. They look forward to grandparents taking them or summer camps. If I want to do something for myself, I feel guilty. It seems like a lot of the people here really love their kids, think that they are cool, smart, funny, and super neat kids, but they regret things like the work it takes to be a parent, the lack of freedom, exhaustion, tedium, that kind of stuff. If you cannot handle the child and it burdens you, walk away, he will hate you, resent you, but he'll never know a father that regrets having him. My dad left when I was a baby and in a way I'm glad. I just need to vent here, the situation has become pretty messed up at home. People’s negative opinions on abortion. Like seriously, a child has all the rights to judge and hate their parents when said parents doesn't take care of them and values something over them. I was inspired by another user's post who seemed to have hit a point of catharsis after venting to this sub, I thought I would try it out as well. 196K subscribers in the Asmongold community. Pay the money and keep your distance from the kid if you truly hate being a father to him. From urinating on my bed to setting fire to things, to being abusive, violent and just downright nasty, to me, his dad, sister, friends, family, teachers Remorse. Look at all these posts about these kids being angry at their dads. My on/off girlfriend of 9 months got pregnant unexpectedly (she was on the pill), and she chose to keep it despite me not wanting to. I unblocked him and he called me and I just cried and cried again. That’s the only positive thing that came from my ‘relationship’ with my father. Also, where’s your mother in all this. It's a small consolation but your child will grow up seeing you put them first. I met Brice-35 (my daughter’s mom) online about six years ago. Pregnancy. I've lost who Having your feelings be constantly pushed aside and passed off as “just being on your period”. Maybe your kids will resent you but everyone makes choices and those choices have consequences. I'm the eldest in a family of four. Being a dad can be tough and thankless. But if you look closely, you can see the aspects of each of their parents. Being underestimated for your gender. I told her from the start I never wanted to be a father and never wanted a serious relationship (with her, but It was worse for me eventually leading to a divorce. If you hate it so much go get a vasectomy now. So if anything this sub says is true: Men are gonna sexual harrass, there is no save space for women, men gonna rape, men are violent, women should be afraid of men etc etc etc. It’s hard and sometimes heartbreaking. I love my baby with all my heart, I could never say that I hate being a dad. You don't need sympathy - you need to be responsible and live with it. You’re really distancing yourself from the child. They do it to themselves and now they are living in a society with angry kids. Naruto was a normal parents till he became a hokage and went overboard. I have three kids: 6, almost 5, and almost 3. You can be the one they turn to in a crisis. I've always been very good with kids. (Some REALLY aren't but imo it's usually due to how they're parented) Hang in there. Most of times it also includes cutting ties from all toxic family members to allow yourself to heal. Being their mom SUCKS. but holy hell does he suck as a human being. What you're not talking about is being in a relationship because you seemed to be like that but not being a dad but you're abandoning that relationship too. My kids are healthy and happy, and I’m an Uber attentive and loving father. I don’t like the toll a career such as police can take on the family but somebody has to do it. His father passed away 2 years ago. And that will last. This is all pretty normal and you will probably get over your hate of being a father when they’re a toddler. Working together makes it satisfying, awesome, easier, and creates a rhythm of co-operation where you both get respite to have free time. You deserve that time and you're likely to hate him through most of that and that is okay. I Absolutely Hate Being the Father of a Child with Autism. . I often think of hurting my children because they drive me so crazy. My mom was VERY regretful of having me because she just didn’t like me as a person. You being there but ignoring her is probably doing more damage than if you would just leave. All I can say is to keep pushing for your goals, save up and move out. If dad pays for the child, he's legally allowed some amount of visitation if he wants it. May 4, 2022 · A dad has opened up about his struggles of being a parent and how he can't stand to be around his daughter. The man is incredibly selfish, stubborn, and a down right ass. I am 31, my husband is 33. And the environment they grow in, the nutrients they are given, the water they get from rain, all of that also makes each flower uniquely beautiful. I grew up poor and had to fend for myself in many ways, and it’s second nature to me. Everything about being a dad is either a big letdown, an exercise in stress management, or just aggravating. Distancing yourself will only make it harder. 6+ years and 2 children (6y girl, 4y boy) later, I have yet to feel fulfilled by being a dad. They'll love the baby phase, or middle school age or teenage. Björn has been on it's way back in the past few years (although according to the stats on SCB it was still just at #66 last year), despite it being a bit ahead of the typical cycle - the average Björn in Sweden is 56,3 years old. Trust me, you're doing one of the most, if not the most, undervalued jobs in the world, but you're still doing excellent! SoCalDan. Putting her to nap/bed is infuriating, and getting her to answer a question requires asking three times sirmaxwell. Right away, I want to make something clear: I’m not a homophobe. I wish I never had kids. I don’t want to be a dad anymore, and I feel nothing for my newborn. 4. ADMIN MOD. 2. The wanting to spend a large amount of money on myself but physically not being able to because there is always something else that is more important that the money has to go to. The issue is, the random urges to travel, but can't. They actually interact and talk and walk and you get to experience things with them, not just around them. Unlike their other parent. This led me to looking past major red flags to have a baby with a woman whom has plagued my life ever since. I have never hated anything as much as I do my son. I hate all this added responsibility, it’s twice the amount of work for not even I (Arnold-35) hate being a father. If you have a white dad and Asian mom, they are your ENEMIES! They will never be parents to you. You do what you do because you are the father etc and some never understand how shitty it can be just to be a "proper man. But seriously, I HATE being a parent. Especially my dad. He’s a cute kid. Your children will be the same. And I dread walking into my house. And Jesus Christ he sucks. One option is to try and date younger when people may be less likely I hate my dad. If I could go back I would not have children. They will have some of your foibles, some of your strengths. The child does nothing but scream no matter what, until the mom comes. Having opportunities taken away just for your gender. Fighting makes parenting a hard, shitty, Herculean task with no feelings of reward. You probably need to change the way that you look after your child if she is screaming so much. I get that it’s a tough choice but unfortunately it’s something you have to deal with now. It's relentless, expensive, tiring, and demands everything from you. I don’t think you want that. As everyone has said: something sounds fishy about her story. I'm 25 and she's 36, and as hard as I've tried to get on board with everything, I still do no not want I hate being a father. I’m sick of living every day for this kid. Literally nothing I do will make them stop, so I end up getting frustrated and putting them down so I can walk away. He feels like people lied to him about the No one should have the right to force anyone else into being a parent. This subreddit is filled with posts about regretting having kids or feeling of resentment but inevitably, it's all from parents in their first year. I consider being their child a form of rape. Everyone around him knew he went overboard. My dad didn’t care or want to know me. I don't regret the children, I regret their father, and I think if I had waited, made sure he was the right person for me before having a baby with him, everything would be different, but he gave me my kids, and my kids are perfect and unregrettable. My child is 8 weeks old. 5 years old - and a 5 months old boy. I hate being a dad. Holding the hate for your father will cause you to struggle with healing and moving on. It’ll get better. I hate being a father I M28 had my son right after I turned 20, I grew up in a broken family and always thought I wanted to be part of a family. I still want my dad. I'm so tired of everyone saying, "it's consistency". Here I was with one. He provides me with a roof above my head. Reply. I also hate my dad and most men I know but I still ended up being a trans man so I don't thing they're related. I'd be very logical and try to pick apart my hatred. I find none of the joy that most dads talk about, there aren't really those small moments that most dads love even in the rough patches. I hated taking care of my siblings growing up. My husband’s family didn’t like me since the beginning: I was a "big city" girl, he had to move 100 km away to be with me (he already worked here, so…), I was childfree and not the submissive wife they had in mind. ta-dad-001. I find myself regretting daily having so many kids so close together. Make the most of the time you have with your little girl man- she will never ever forget you. He spent 12 years as a dad to my brother, and 6 to my sister, 0 to me. Sounds like whatever kind of asshole they're being now, between them mom and dad have done their duty to you, in spades. You may be a story they tell their own children one day - ‘my deadbeat father’. My daughter is six. Regardless of how you answer, talking to a good therapist would be wise. Equality in both directions. Your father being indecisive and not providing the guidance you would’ve wanted is a singular personality or family dynamics issue. My father is a decent parent. I hate being a Father. I hate it. He just fucking sucks. I perform all of my fatherly / parental duties to promote the healthy development of my child out of responsibility and guilt, not because of want or love the process like my wife does. I feel like I was forced to grow up way to fast and I would be lying if part of me said I didn't resent my parents for having me knowing they couldn't afford to. [Remorse]: My kids are normal, happy-go-lucky kids, 8 and 4 respectively. But I hate being a father. ago. I still feel like I’m processing his death and managing a household solo, while being ADD is so hard. As someone who had a shitty dad, even though they were together, I forever love my mom for putting me first. I said it didn’t do me any real harm, but that doesn’t mean growing up without a dad wasn’t difficult. I became a dad at 18. I would say that I'm generally a kind and loving person, and I usually find some redeeming quality even in the people I disagree with the most. Award. You're both in a rut, so you need to put your head down and bring your A game and step up. Maybe get a vasectomy so you don't have to think about having kids any more. You just need to be like Elizabeth Tudor of England or Catherine the Great of Russia—wait for your time to come! *hugs* This isn't your fault. He's disrespectful of service staff, he's tactless, he insults And I referred to a father watching his children as babysitting, and not parenting. You hate being an infant dad. You sound pretty selfish, dude. These include financial, cultural, underlying biases etc. Your child does whether you like it or not. You asked for it, jerk. Focus on the positive and count your blessings. The hardest part is when a child is struggling and you can't help them. It’s probably the sleep deprivation and the stress talking but I hate being a dad. Sep 20, 2021 · A dad, who chose to remain anonymous to avoid any judgment, took to Reddit to rant about his living situation: "I really do hate being a parent. I absolutely do not believe you hate being a father, if you did, you wouldn’t be concerned about your feelings. I think a People who hate boruto for not liking his father being Absent are weird. And their reply is "evil kids" or some dumb crap like that. I'm going to go over there tomorrow. Now this kid will grow with a dad who doesn't care about it and parents who hate each other. I love them. My step-dad ended up being the BEST. This painful experience will teach you what NOT to be and maybe one day, support your kids the way your father didn’t support you. They look forward to their kids being adults from the very beginning. Like tomorrow. I think I hate my dad. la hg rs vh jb ck ez af xu vh